The morning after… and lunch.

This morning after I finished writing about the awful night I’d had being all passive and depressed, I started doing laundry and cleaning up around the house. I was still thinking about what I could have done differently, how I could turn my passive behavior into aggressive behavior, step by step. I really wasn’t thinking about anything very sexual and I didn’t feel particularly randy or anything, but as I stood folding sheets in the bedroom, I could feel my crotch getting all wet and slippery. Mentally, I didn’t feel turned on at all, in fact, I was exhausted. But when I stuck my hand down my jeans, sure enough things were ready for action! What’s gotten into you, Grace? I thought as I shoved the half folded sheet aside and laid down on the bed. There’s something very nice and peaceful about mid-morning masturbation, with the bedroom window open, a nice spring breeze drifting in, and birds singing in the trees. I surprised myself at how revved up I seemed to be down there, despite not really having any reason to be. When I zipped up my jeans and glanced over at the clock, it was just after noon. Lunch time.

Holden works about 20 minutes away in the next town over. He sometimes comes home over his lunch break to have something hot to eat or to take care of some things around the house. Today he was going to have one thing to take care of around the house. I messaged him at work and asked if he’d eaten yet and whether he’d like to come home. I offered to make him a sandwich (irresistible bait!) and he told me he was running a little behind but would be home around 1:00. That gave me just enough time to fix both our sandwiches and stash them in the microwave (no room in the fridge and if I left them on the table they’d be pillaged by marauding cats), finish putting the sheets away, and select a condom to have ready on the bed.

When he pulled up in front of our house, he didn’t suspect a thing. I could tell he thought I looked cute today in my snug fit jeans and off the shoulders tee shirt. I said, “Oh good you’re here,” before pouncing to kiss him ravenously, removing his sunglasses and undoing his shirt buttons before he got two steps from the door. I led him into the bedroom by his shirt tail and finished undressing him and myself in seconds. His look of appreciative surprise made me smile as I pushed him onto his back on the bed and hovered over him, kissing little lines all over his chest and stomach that gave him shivers, and letting my breasts brush teasingly against his erection. I reached up next to his head and grabbed the condom. “Put this on.”

I watched him roll the condom on and without a word, but locking eye contact, I slid onto him. I was still plenty wet from before and I rode him to make myself cum four or five times before suggesting that we switch so he could really pound me like I knew he wanted to. As he entered me from behind the shock of the new sensation this angle gave me brought me to orgasm within a few moments and Holden wasn’t far behind with a shuddering, head splitting orgasm that threatened to rip him apart. Yeah, it was that good.

We curled up together in a panting heap. I wondered if Holden was making any connections between this and the way I’d acted last night. I glanced over at him. He hadn’t yet regained the power of speech, so I decided not to bring it up.

I got dressed and started setting lunch out on the kitchen table while Holden cleaned up and got dressed too. We ate our lunch sitting very close to each other on the bench that faces the table (rather than have two chairs, we have a single bench that faces the window.) Neither of us spoke, but it was the good kind of silence; calm, satisfied, simply enjoying being close to each other. As we both slowly regained our grasp on reality and neared the end of our sandwiches, I told him I’d written a blog post about how I was feeling last night. He asked if there was more to it than the fact that the mood was ruined, and I told him briefly about my frustration over being so passive and added, “But now I get to write a follow-up post to that. A happy one.”

I kissed him goodbye and he drove back to work. It’s times like this when I think back to that movie, Dead Poets Society. Remember that movie? With Robert Sean Leonard looking so hot in his high school uniform and so sexy playing Puck? My best friend and I saw that movie in high school and immediately adopted the motto “Carpe diem!” And we really lived by it. It helped me find the courage to do a lot of really great things I would have otherwise shied away from. I think over the years I’ve forgotten to keep that motto in mind and I’ve let that attitude slip away from me. Today, I remembered to seize the day, and I think I may remember to do that more often from now on.

-Grace